The New Trailer For X-Men: Apocalypse Is Bleak AF

The New Trailer For <i>X-Men: Apocalypse</i> Is Bleak AF

If you’re a paranoid doomsday predictor, then boy, is the trailer for you.

The newest trailer for X-Men: Apocalypse just emerged like the titular god-mutant from the Egyptian rubble, and it is grandiose in scale as Apocalypse’s ability to grow in size.¬†Sexually.

Just kidding, but the trailer does feature the 80s version of all your favorite genetically unique superheroes as they either team up with the all powerful missing member of the Blue Man Group, or go head-to-blueberry-tinted-head against him.

Of course, Magneto joins Apocalypse as one of his four horseman, although it really is debatable if he A) actually knows how to ride a horse, or B) actually rides a horse.

While¬†Apocalypse‘s stakes are more global than personal (Apocalypse wants to cleanse the world of the weak for the powerful, which makes him a frontrunner for the Republican nomination), it’s admittedly hard to relate to a mutant who is more of an Old Testament god than human.

Will Professor X defeat this deity? Will Storm change to the good side? Will Oscar Isaac play an acoustic guitar at some point?

Time will tell, but you know what else I can tell you, if Jennifer Lawrence is in it, I will be at a movie theater watching this at some point.